My least favorite word.

Just just isn't so nice sometimes.

While I listened to Armchair Expert’s Dax and Monica discuss his Diet Coke addiction, my mind was opened to the effects of the phrase, “Why don’t you just…?” Rather than go from one hundred to zero Diet Cokes a day, Monica suggested Dax (an addict in all the ways) to consider just a few Diet Cokes a day. And he was triggered. Rightfully so.

Say these out loud: 

“I know you’re so busy with work, just hire someone to help with the kids a few hours a day.”

“Can’t you just quit drinking during the week?”

(Did you squint your eyes or smirk a bit when you said just? Be honest.)

Or how about “Just do it.”

Whatever comes after the word just is met with defensiveness or silence because we’ve lost the person we’re trying to help. Their guard is up because they just can’t

When used like this, just has an air of better than, an arrogance, or superiority. Like, the solution to your problem is so obvious I can’t believe you didn’t think of it or even worse, I can’t believe you just can’t fix it. Most likely, the person using the phrase excels at handling that particular type or can’t relate. They want to be encouraging but quickly fail as soon as just comes out.

And yes, sometimes we have to tell ourselves to Just Do It because, well, life must go on. But next time you’re considering telling someone else to just do something, maybe think twice. Think hard about how that phrase makes you feel and maybe, just don’t.